


Left Behind

by Otakugirl1228



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Anxiety, Crying, Fights, M/M, Makkachin - Freeform, Yuri K. lost the onsen on ice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-16
Updated: 2017-10-22
Packaged: 2019-01-18 08:21:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12384450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Otakugirl1228/pseuds/Otakugirl1228
Summary: What if Yuri had lost the onsen on ice? What would happen? How would he react? What would happen between he and Victor? Would they still end up together in the end?





	1. Chapter 1

"The winner of the Hot Springs on ice is Yuri Plisetsky! Congratulations Yuri! Do you have anything you would like to say to our viewers at home?"

Yuri sat staring at the floor. He had messed up, big time, and there was no coming back from this moment. He was going to be left behind by Victor. After all, Yurio had won fair, and square and his request was for Victor to come back to Russia and be his coach. Yuri didn't think that he would be able to recover from this loss.

He had no coach now, no one to help him choreograph his free program, no one to offer support and creative criticism, tell him what he was doing wrong, he had nothing. He looked up at the two smiling faces on the podium, he stood to the side, watching as everyone cheered.

'I let all of them down again. I worked so hard, only to let everyone down again, and now Victor will go back to Russia. This is all my fault if only I wasn't such a failure! If only I could not let my anxiety do this to me if only I could make them proud of me instead of always disappointed.' He could feel the tears starting to build up in his eyes, he needed to escape.

He took one last look at Victor before he ran, he needed to leave the rink all together, and he needed to do so now. He ran towards the ocean, it was still early spring so he knew that no one would be there, he sat on a rock that jutted out of the sand. He let the tears flow freely now, knowing that no one would disturb him here. Victor was probably already on his way to the airport with Yurio anyways, and besides, why would he come and look for Yuri, he was just the loser of the competition. Someone who didn't even make it to world's last year, what did it matter if he just disappeared, after all, Yurio was the one with all the talent.

He once again felt the hot tears building in his eyes only this time he did not hold them back, he allowed them to flow freely from his eyes. He didn't want Victor to go, he didn't want to give up his dream either, but he knew that both of these things were bound to happen since Victor was leaving. He knew that everybody was too preoccupied with Yurio's win to come looking for him, or even notice that he was gone.  
He placed his head on his knees, and some part of him knew that this was the end of his career the end of his dream. The bitter taste of defeat was all that he had left to remind him of his dream. The dream he was now sure would never come true.

He had let everyone down, they all had helped him so much yet all he did was let them down. He was just a disappointment to everyone. To Yuuko, Nishigori, Minako, and even Victor. They had all worked so hard to help him, yet all he did was fail them once again.

"Yuri!" Yuri could hear his name being called, but he paid no mind to it and just ignored the sound of the voice coming towards him. He didn't want to be near anyone right now, and he just wanted to be alone.

"Yuri!There you are I have been looking for you! Why did you leave all of a sudden?" Yuri turned slightly to see none other than Victor standing behind him. Yuri knew that his face was a mess right now, and seeing Victor here he felt as if his entire world was standing still, why was Victor here? Why did he come to find him? Shouldn't he be with Yurio?

Yuri just turned away from Victor tears still streaming down his face, he didn't want Victor to see him like this. He didn't want Victor to see how weak he was.

"Victor...aren't you supposed to be with Yurio?" He said sniffling, he hated when he was like this, and he most certainly didn't want Victor to see him like this.

"Yuri I was worried about you, you just disappeared after the announcement. Yuri your performance was beautiful, but there was something missing and it would have been the key to you winning. But I still believe that you will be able to make it to the Grand Prix Final without me as your coach! You can come to Russia, and learn under Yakov!" Victor said this with a smile, and Yuri knew that he was just trying to comfort Yuri at this point, however, it wasn't working.

"Victor... I can't...I can't disappoint everyone again..."  
"What do you mean Yuri?"  
"Victor, I'm...I'm going to stay here in Japan..."

"That's okay Yuri! I am sure that we can find you a great coach here in Japan! You must want to stay close to your family after all you were gone for five years!" Yuri shook his head, Victor didn't understand what he was saying at all.

"Victor...I am going to retire...I disappointed everyone again today...I disappointed you today...I don't want to let everyone down again so...I am just going to retire Victor...I'm sorry..."

"Yuri you didn't disappoint anyone today! Is that what you think you did? You were, and have always been amazing Yuri! Just because you have had a losing streak doesn't mean you can't have a winning streak as well! You are only twenty-three Yuri, you still have time to win yourself a gold medal! We can find you a different coach, and you will flourish I am sure of it!"

"Victor please just go back to Yurio...he has always had more potential than me...and he always will. It only makes sense that the legend should be the coach of the new rising star of Russia...instead of me some overweight idiot like me..."

"Yuri you're not-"

"JUST GO BACK TO YURIO VICTOR! GO BACK TO RUSSIA!" Yuri snapped at Victor, and as soon as he had said it he immediately regretted it. Victor's blue eyes shone with pain that had come from those words. But he couldn't take back those words no matter how he wished he could.

He watched as Victor stood up, and turned his back to Yuri, his silver hair fluttering softly in the breeze as he kept his head bowed.

"Fine, if that is what you want Yuri I will go back to Yurio, and then we will be on the first flight out of Japan...I will have some movers come get my stuff so don't concern yourself with it Yuri...goodbye." Yuri watched as he began to walk away from him, leaving him behind on the cold beach, but before he left Yuri spoke up, knowing that he should still be within an earshot.

"Victor...I am sorry, please come back...Victor please...please don't leave me alone...I am sorry please come back...please...I...I didn't mean it..." He said those words over, and over but even if Victor heard him he made no move to come back to him, and it was clear that Victor was upset with him.

He tried saying it a little louder but to no avail. It was clear that he had been left behind on the beach by himself, and Victor wasn't coming back for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Tumblr [here](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/otakugirl1228)! Feel free to send me prompts there and I will do my best to write them!


	2. Chapter 2

He watched as the movers removed Victor's belongings from the room he used to stay in. Victor had been true to his word and had already left for the airport that day before Yuri even had a chance to come back, and he would have been lying if he wasn't hurt even more by this. He didn't even get to say goodbye, and he knew that he probably would never get to say hello to him again either.

He watched as the last of his stuff was taken from his room with tears in his eyes. This was all his fault, if only he hadn't let his emotions overcome him like that maybe...maybe he would have gone with Victor to Russia, at least then he could have stayed by his side...and maybe he would get to skate on the same ice as him again. He was regretting everything he did that day due to his emotions he hated the fact that he had hurt Victor....he hated himself for that.

He watched the truck carrying Victor's belongings drive away, and he felt as if a part of him was taken away on that truck as well, and he felt the tears once again well up in his eyes. He jogged towards the beach, he just wanted to forget that this had ever happened that he had ever met Victor that he had ever let him be disappointed in him...that he had ever grown feelings for him. He wanted to forget it all to save him from the pain...the pain that he had caused himself.

He watched the gray sea as it churned and crashed onto the shore, on any other day it would calm him just like the ice would, although he hadn't touched the ice since the competition with Yurio, lately, however, everything had just been falling apart.

He had totally isolated himself, he barely talked to his parents, heck he barely even talked to Phichit and he was his best friend. He knew his depression was beginning to rear its ugly head once again leaving him feeling completely useless. He hated this feeling, he hated feeling constantly numb or sad. He hated every second of it, and he just wanted to escape this feeling, these thoughts. He wanted to be rid of them.

He tried keeping busy composing music, and even dancing with Minako, but his mind would always wonder there, to the place of what might have happened if he had gone with Victor. Would he have been happy? He thinks that he would, but at the same time he knew that he couldn't take any of it back now, he couldn't fix the things he had done wrong. Even if that was all that he wanted to do, and he knew that there was no way that he could go to Russia and expect Victor to ever forgive him.

After several hours of sitting on the beach, he headed back home. His parents greeted him, and he only smiled as he went to his room. There sat the costume that Victor had given him, the last thing of Victor's that was still in this house, and every time he says it more tears welled up in his eyes, he knew it was stupid. He knew that he shouldn't he was the one who had pushedVictor away, he was the one that had ruined everything, so there was no reason for him to be upset right? So why did he feel so guilty, and sad?

Over the next several weeks his parents and sister grew more concerned for the raven haired male. He had nearly stopped eating altogether, and he appeared to not be getting nearly enough sleep. They were concerned and constantly asked him if he was okay.

"Are you okay Yuri?" They would ask him and yet the only thing he ever said was, that he was fine.

"I am fine mom, I am just going to go to Minako's to practice." They knew that this was a lie, and they didn't know what to do for him. That was until Minako got a hold of them, and they happened to agree on one thing in particular. Yuri and Victor needed to make up.

Unsurprisingly Minako was the one to call him after all the two of them had exchanged numbers so that he could check up on Yuri while he was still his coach.

"Hello, Minako! It has been a while since I've spoken with you how are you?" Victor sounded relaxed, as he always did, however, Minako didn't know how he would take to talking to Yuri again.

"Hello, Victor! I am well, and I am sure that you have been okay as well. But I am afraid that I didn't call to chat, I am calling about Yuri."

"What is wrong with him....? Is he injured?" Victor sounded concerned despite the fight that Minako suspected they had had the day of the hots springs on-ice competition that they had had.

"No, it just seems that he has barely been eating, nor sleeping as of late. He has been overworking himself, and barely talking to his family, nor his friends. He hasn't touched the ice since you left, and he has been acting this way as well, and well I was wondering if you had any idea as to why he was acting this way." She heard Victor sigh over the receiver.

"After the competition, he disappeared, and so I went to the place that I thought that I might find him, and I found him sitting on the beach. I knew that he was upset, so I wanted to comfort him...but we got into a spat, and well I was upset....and even though while I was walking away I heard him saying that he was sorry, and he didn't mean it....I never once turned around...and I ended up leaving before he came back. Yurio and I took the first flight out of there...to be honest, I know that I shouldn't have just left him like that but I was too upset to stop and think about what I was doing..." Minako let out a loud groan when she heard this, and from the sounds of it, they had both been pigheaded at the time and were both clearly upset about what had happened. But neither of them had thought to contact the other about what had happened.

"Victor, you haven't spoken to Yuri since this happened to have you?"

"No, I haven't..." Victor could have sworn that in that moment he hear Minako growl at him, and he jumped.

"Then you either need to call him or get your ass back here so you can both apologize to one another like the adults that I know the two of you are!" Victor once again jumped at the harshness in her voice.

"Yes, Minako!"

"Now Victor!"

"Yes ma'm!" Victor then began to scramble about to figure out how on Earth he was going to get into contact with Yuri again.


	3. Chapter 3

Yuri had no idea what he was expecting from himself anymore, he found that most days he was either at Minako's studio or sitting on the beach for hours alone with his thoughts. Which wasn't always a good thing because it always meant one thing. That his mind would drift back to Victor.

He knew that he was in the wrong, he knew it, but even still he had no way to apologize to him for the things that he had said. Nor did he know how he was going to tell him those things, after all, he was the one who had let himself be carried away with his emotions after all. It was his fault things had become like this with Victor, and there was no reason for him to even feel like the victim, or sad because that those things were said. He wanted to stop thinking about it but it seemed like all his mind could focus on was Victor and only Victor no matter how hard he tried to think of anything else it always went back to him wether he liked it or not.

He knew now that he had feelings for the silver-haired man, but he had ruined every chance he might have gotten to be with him on that one day. That one stupid day where he said things that he didn't mean all because he was upset, but that wasn't a reason to treat Victor in that way he knew that, but even when Yuri had tried to apologize he just kept walking away...so maybe Victor didn't care about him anymore...

Yuri knew that this was very unlikely but his mind jumped on that band wagon and rode it, all the way to hell and back.

'Victor never cared about you!'

'He was only using you to take a break!'

'He didn't even say goodbye to you why would you think that he cared about your feelings!'

'He left you alone crying on the beach for hours before you headed home, and he wasn't even there when you got there!'

'You disappointed everyone again!'

'Why are you such a disappointment!'

'Why!!'

Yuri shook his head in an effort to get rid of these thoughts, but it was not long before Yuri could feel the familiar constraint in his chest, and he felt as though he couldn't breathe. Everything was his fault! It was his own fault he lost the competitions, his own fault that he upset Victor and now he would never talk to him again, his own fault that he was like this! It was all his fault! He was nothing but a failure...and that was when he felt someone tap on his shoulder, but he couldn't register who it was.

Who was touching him? Where was he? Who was this? Why were they hugging him?! They smell so familiar but who is this? Who was the one holding him in his arms right now?

"Shhh...Yuri...It's okay Yuri...Take a deep breath with me. Good job Yuri. That is it just breathe Yuri."This voice was comforting and familiar, and Yuri felt that he had no reason not to listen to this voice they sounded familiar and he felt safe in his arms.

Yuri felt his breathing slowly go back to a more controlled pace, and his heart rate decreased and steadied to an even and healthy pace, and he slumped against the body that was securely holding him in his warm arms. It felt nice, safe even...

"Are you back with me Yuri?" Yuri only slowly nodded as he slowly drifted to sleep against the other man's shoulder. He was so tired, he knew that after anxiety attacks he was drained, and usually slept for hours on end without waking up once.

"Alright, Yuri get some sleep I will get us back to your house." He barely registered the person lifting him up, and carrying towards  where he assumed was his house, but in this moment he couldn't careless he felt safe, and he knew this person was familiar so he just allowed them to carry him back to where he assumed his house was.

When Yuri woke up several hours later he was no longer on the beach but instead in his own room curled up underneath the covers feeling more rested than he had in weeks. He slowly blinked as he took in his surroundings and got up to get ready for the day, but when he got into the dining room he was met with a sight he never once thought he would ever see again.

Victor was sitting at the table in the inns robes talking with his mother, and Yuri had no idea what to do or say as Victor turned around Yuri's brown eyes meeting Victor's ice blue ones, he was completely frozen under the gaze that belonged to no one other than Victor Nikiforov.


	4. Chapter 4

Yuri watched ad Victor made his way towards him, he was tense as he watched the man with silver hair make his way through his parent's banquet hall. Yuri stepped back not knowing what to do in this case unable to think, unable to breathe.

"Yuri...can we talk?" Yuri gave one look towards him before he once again took off towards his room, slamming the door shut behind him. 

"Yuri let me in! Please!"

"No!" Yuri shook his head and held the door shut, he didn't know why Victor was here or what he wanted, and it scared him. 

"Alright Yuri we don't have to face one another I'll talk and you listen alright? Yuri shuffled a bit in his room before he finally spoke up.

"A-alright...." Victor let out a sigh of relief before he took a deep breath and began to speak to Yuri.

"Yuri I am sorry I left you there on the beach...I heard what you said before I left...I know that you apologized Yuri. I am so sorry I left you there I was just so upset and angry with you at the time I didn't even stop to think about what I was doing, and for that, I am sorry Yuri I should have never left you without saying goodbye. I wasn't thinking about how that might make you feel Yuri and that was incredibly selfish of me. I am sorry Yuri please forgive me!" 

Yuri didn't know what to think, or even what to say. All this time, Victor had been feeling guilty as well, but for some reason, a part of him felt that all the things that had happened between the two of them were his fault. All of it had to be his fault. After all he was the one who had said such hurtful things to Victor, that caused him to be so upset. It was all his fault. 

"No Victor...everything that happened...it was because of me...if....if I would have never said those things to you this....would have never happened....it is all my fault. I don't deserve you....." The tears were streaming down Yuri's face once again, the voices in his head telling him how it was all his fault. He didn't deserve Victor, and he never would. 

Yuri's hand on the handle faltered, and he felt the door slide open, and his head whipped around to see Victor stepping into his room. He steeped back away from him, the tears still streaming down his face, he had to get away from Victor. Yuri couldn't face him like this he was an absolute wreck, he didn't want Victor to see him like this ever but now, now he was standing in front to him. 

"Yuri...." Yuri tried to move away from Victor, but soon Victor had his arms wrapped around him holding him close. "Yuri I am so sorry....I was so upset....because I love you, and there you were being so upset and I couldn't do a single thing to help you....I am a horrible person......"

Yuri's eyes widened , and he tried to break free from Victor's grasp.  
"You're lying! you can't love me! I don't deserve you! You should hate me for the awful things I said to you!" He cried out trying once again to break free from his grasp on him, but Victor held him tightly and closed the door behind him.   
"Yuri I love you I do! So please don't say that you're not worthy of my love for you. I love you so much..." Yuri began to sink to the floor and Victor followed him down still holding him in his arms tightly rubbing soothing patterns on Yuri's back with his fingers.

"I love you Yuri please believe me." Yuri sobbed into Victor's chest. "We both said things that we didn't mean that day, but Yura please believe me that I did not mean any hurtful thing I said. I truly love you, no matter what you or I said that day." Victor continued to say soft things into his ear about how much he loved him, and he did this until Yuri finally calmed down, and to Victor's surprise he whispered.

"I love you too...."


	5. Epilouge

It has been several years since the whole misunderstanding between Yuri and Victor, and let's just say after the two of then made up it still took Yuri quite a while to believe that Victor was actually in love with him, but eventually he did. Victor even managed to get Yuri to move with him to Russia, and he coached both Yuri, and Yurio. 

Of course Yurio was not too thrilled with the fact, but he supposed it was better than having Victor constantly being mopey, and complaining about how he wanted to be with Yuri, and grew to accept the fact that Victor was coaching the both of them. Of course he never told them that. 

Now the two of them were very happy, and they had gotten married to one another, and they lived in absolute bliss with one another. Of course it wasn't always perfect they still had petty fights, and they had their share of hardships but they always managed to get through them together. Unlike the major misunderstanding though they were a little better at communicating with one another.

"Vitya. I am so glad we have made it through all that we have. I love you so much and I don't think I could ever imagine life without you." Victor smiled and drew Yuri close placing a loving kiss on his forehead.

"Yura I feel the same. I am so happy that we have been able to push through everything and manage to still love each other for all this time, I think I would die without you." He said being over dramatic once again, Yuri only let out a laugh as Victor began to smother him in kisses.

"Vitya! Stop it!" He said giggling as he placed the exaggerated kisses all over his face.

"You know you love me Yura." He said finally stopping his exaggerated kisses.

"Yes Vitya, I'll always love you you know that."

"Of course Yura, I will always love you as well." He hugged Yuri close to himself, and they both knew that no matter what came their way.

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on Tumblr [here](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/otakugirl1228)! Feel free to send me prompts there and I will do my best to write them!


End file.
